General peer-support guidance. Not counselling, legal advice or crisis care. This content has not received independent clinical review.
Is this about you?
I’m thinking about suicide. What can I do right now? →Ask the question clearly
Choose a private moment if it is safe. Say what concerns you, then ask: “Are you thinking about suicide?” Use the word suicide rather than a vague question about doing something silly.
Let him answer. Avoid sounding as though only “no” is acceptable. You can say: “I’m glad you told me. Let’s get someone who can help us with this.”
If he says yes, stay connected and get help
If life is in immediate danger or he has already harmed himself, call 000. Otherwise help him contact Lifeline on 13 11 14 now. Stay with him if safe, or arrange a reliable person to stay. Do not put yourself in danger.
If you are speaking remotely, ask where he is so help can reach him. If there is immediate danger, contact emergency services with the information you have. Do not promise secrecy about serious safety concerns.
If he says no, or will not answer
Do not treat one answer as proof that everything is safe. Explain what still concerns you and call Lifeline for guidance if you are unsure. You are a friend, not a risk-assessment service.
Avoid turning the conversation into a debate about whether his life is good enough. He does not need a list of people who have it worse or a warning that he is letting others down.
Make the handover practical
Ask: “Would you like me beside you while you call?” Offer the phone, find a quieter space or help him explain the concern. Do not make a promise to stay alive the condition for your help.
Once immediate support is in place, agree a realistic next contact and encourage ongoing professional care. Get support for yourself too. For optional Christian reflection, Psalm 34:18 offers language of closeness in suffering; prayer must accompany, never delay, urgent action.
Further guidance
The practical examples and Christian reflections are original writing. These independent sources inform the conversation and safety guidance; their inclusion does not imply endorsement of Men’s Mission Australia.
Scripture for personal reading: Psalm 34:18.